From The Heart: Make You Proud

A few hours ago, my dad sat me down when I came home and talked to me a bit school and just wanted to know how I was doing and stuff. It really sucked knowing I wasn't doing so well but I told my dad I was doing fine. He asked me if it was hard, if I was doing okay, things like that. He told me that now that I'm in university, I'm more free and he doesn't really know what's going on too much in school and stuff. But he told me it's okay, cuz he trusts me and he wants me to have a plan...especially since my brother didn't finish school...he just wants me to do what I like and not quit halfway. That really hit me hard, and it broke my heart...I just sat there and didn't say a word, just taking it everything he was saying to me. He told me he just wanted to see me happy...that he and my mom work so hard not for themselves, but to make my life and my brother's life easier. It really hit me hard this whole school thing...how I'm pretty much starting from ground zero...I dunno...I've had this convo with friends before, how none of use are gonna be failures, we're all gonna do fine in life...but no doubt there'll be bumps and falls down the road to the destination. It really sparked a soft spot in me...my dad was just talking about working hard and things like that. And I just really wanna make my parents proud you know...they're providing and doing everything for me now and when it comes time, I want to be able to do that for them. My dad just talked about a lot of things from school to work to life to friends...I wish I blogged right after the conversation but I had dinner...I dunno...as much as I get annoyed and sometimes frustrated and I give my dad attitude when he gives me those talks and stuff like that, I really do love it deep and I know that it's for my benefit. I guess I'm trying to cherish the time you have with your mom and dad...listen to every word they say because they only care and love you and want the best for you. It's weird, but I've thought about the day my parents pass...and the funeral...and just breaking down and not being able to speak or whatever. My dad always tells me, he has 4 other siblings and when his dad use to give lectures, they would all leave the dinner table and my dad would stay and listen to everything he had to say. Same with my dad, my brother would always leave and I would always stay...not to be rude though...sometimes I would zone out, but would stay not to be rude, and sometimes I would actually pay attention. So I guess what I'm trying to say is...as angry, frustrated and pissed off you get at your parents for whatever reason or whatever...think long and hard before you act out and give them attitude, I have to work on this too, but yeah...they love you with all their heart, they might show it weirdly or have trouble trying to get through to you and you might take it as rude or mean...but they love you with all their heart and I can tell you from personal experience it breaks their heart when you talk back to them, give them attitude or brush them off and ignore them. They just want the best for you and they have so much more experience in this world and they just hope that they can share this wisdom with you so you don't make the same mistakes that you do. But yeah...I often give advice that I need to take as well...but yeah, that's it...thanks for reading all the way here, appreciate it.