Guest Writer #11: Ghost Writer

Guest Writer #1: SpeakingMyMind
Guest Writer #2: Letters To You
Guest Writer #3: TC
Guest Writer #4: Anonymous Queen B
Guest Writer #5: Someone You Used To Know
Guest Writer #6: Heartlocked
Guest Writer #7: LG Slayer 231
Guest Writer #8: TC
Guest Writer #9: G. Ho
Guest Writer #10: Golden Frieza

Being Successful

What does it mean to be successful? This is a question I have been trying to visualize for my future for the past few years. On one hand, there’s making tons of money to the point where you live a luxurious life but there is also success in contentment. Which one will be the best? Making money is obviously the choice that is the one most people want but would I say that is even success. If you are content with what life is giving you I’d say you are way more successful than the man trying to make the next business deal or the person making $50 dollars an hour. I’ve had a conversation with many friends on this. Being in the profession I’m in, you don’t make that much money compared to the 9-5 office job but rather you get what you make for yourself. At first I really wanted just a 9-5 job where everything is stable but my friend said one thing that really struck me. You work so much in a 9-5 for a small vacation time, but instead if you like what you do, every day will become a vacation. I knew the old cliché statement of “do what you like, not what earns more money” and I always wanted that. All my friends are out there making 20 dollars an hour in some summer job where as I don’t make anywhere close to that. I wonder sometimes if it’s even worth it to be doing what I am doing. However, I’m not in a rush to find out where I am going to go. I hear that the most fun you’ll have in your life is when you weren’t sure where you will end up. Maybe finding your way to success is really what it’s about more than success itself.

Being Content

If it’s one thing I’ve learned is that you should be content with what you have. Stop trying to be something you aren’t. Most of my life, I’ve tried to keep up with people, constantly looking somewhere else instead of where I am. I was never satisfied with only hanging out with one group of friends, I wanted a bit of everything. However, now as I look around, it’s those you put effort into that stick around. I’ve learned to build friendships not fake them. Don’t go for the ones who look best when you walk around in public. Find those who really mesh with you because eventually, it won’t matter who is cooler because everyone is cool when you become an adult. Be happy with what you got. Don’t change yourself just to fit in. Don’t find the ones who will only stay with you because you act a certain way or party a lot. Find ones who you know will stick with you through thick and thin.   

To My Future Wife Part 3

Part 1
Part 2

I love watching like cute proposal videos and marriage videos, I'm corny like that lol...I was listening to Savage Garden - I Knew I Loved You Before I Met You and was inspired. So, to my future wife...sorry in advance that you're going to end up with me, I'm a complicated guy and I know I sometimes come with a lot of baggage, so I know you're going to be a hella strong woman physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually to be able to handle me. Sorry for everything you're going to have to put up with...from my laziness, to my lack of initiative to do the dishes, clean the house or mow the lawn. As a matter a fact, sorry cuz I\ll most likely be the one who constantly messes up the house, sorry for being such a slob. But I promise I'll change, it's all definitely a work in progress...and being with you, well I know it'll make me better...a better man, a better husband and definitely a better father. To my future wife...know this, I'm gonna love the life out of you to the point where it overwhelms you. I'm going to do everything in my power to make you happy, to never see you in pain or sadness, even if that means sacrificing my own happiness. I wanna put you first in everything that I do, to lead you first and foremost to Christ, but as well to lead you in every aspect of your walk and growth as an individual. I wanna love you like Jesus loved us, I wanna sacrifice for you, I wanna know you inside and out. I wanna take you on spontaneous dates because you're worth it, I wanna cook you breakfast in bed for no reason and surprise you at work with flowers just to see your smile light up the room. I'm sorry for the times that I may get mad or upset at you...it'll happen, that's life, that's love, but I know every argument and night where I sleep on the couch because of something stupid I did will be worth it and will only serve to help us both grow individually and together. I wanna be the best dad ever...wear those corny shirts that says Number 1 Dad....put our kids in sports teams and watch their every game. Sorry in advance for spoiling our daughter, I can't help it, she's daddy's little girl. I'm sorry for being so tough on our son, I want him to be strong, so one day he can lead his family one day. Thank you for being with me, for loving me and being there for me through everything. I thank God every day before I go to sleep that I get to wake up to you every morning, to smiles, to kisses, to comfort and to an everlasting love. To my future wife...I can't wait to share the rest of my life with you.

My Spirit Animal

You know how people always ask questions like oh if you could be one animal, what would you be? I've always wanted to be something cool like a lion, the king of the jungle or a wolf, sometimes travelling in a pack and sometimes a lone wolf. But one night, I was trying to sleep and for some reason, I was like hm, I'm def not a lion, a lion is the alpha, the top of the food chain, that's definitely not me. I don't think I'm a wolf, wolves are ferocious, calculated...I sat there thinking about my interactions with my friends, with strangers, with people I've just met...and I'm like, hmmm....I've got it...I\m a turtle...LOOOOOL. A turtle is often pretty cautious...withdrawing in it's shell if it senses danger, putting up a guard if it's uncomfortable. That's kinda like me...I pick and choose my moments to let my guard down. I've been told that I can be hard to approach sometimes and that's true, I put up my guard...or I hide in my shell per say. But at the same time I've been told that I'm very friendly and I have a warm personality...so like a turtle...I guess it's 50/50 with me...some days, I'm in my shell and some days I'm not. Sometimes, I get frightened or nervous and hide in my shell and proceed with caution. Funny story, pretty sure I've told this before....couple years ago, I went to this retreat with my 2 friends and we didn't really know anybody. My 2 friends bunked together, so I ended up sharing a room and a bed with a stranger, I ended up being pretty cool with the guy, he was a friendly guy. So we're sleeping, and we're just talking, keep in mind we're in the same bed, he goes hey man...when I saw you walk in with your boys, I told myself, that guy looks really friendly, I sensed that you had a really warm personality and I was right...LOOOOL I was in bed trying to sleep like uh...thanks man, kinda weirded out, but thankful for the compliment lol. Thinking back to that story, it was hilarious lol...The more I think about it, a turtle suits me pretty well, I'm not a very aggressive, violent or physical person, I'm pretty passive, I like to chill and sort things out passively and calmly lol...just call me Franklin I guess.

A Lesson In Humility

Every summer for the past like 5 years, I play softball for this church and it usually takes up a good chunk of my time during the summer. So I remember in my 2nd year I believe, I had a close friend who played for another team and I saw that we were facing her team for our last game of the season, so we would always like jokingly talk trash back and forth. As the season progresses, they hadn't won a game and we ourselves won like 2.7 or 3/6 games...so we would talk a lot of trash leading up tot he game like oh, it's gonna be so easy, we're gonna beat them by so much, we're gonna hit so many home runs. Come game time...were like 2/7 I'm pretty sure and they're 0/9....the last game of the season and we're cocky as heck...everything falls apart...our hits were solid, our defence was half hearted, it seemed like everything went their way and against our way. It ended up being a pretty close game near the end, but there was no dramatic ending, straight up...they won. I remember being distraught, shocked, pissed, upset, angry...and my friend, the coach at the time was probably feeling double of everything that I was feeling. The morale of our team was pretty low, we knew we had just lost a game that we could have and should have won, but our heads were down for a different reason, as they yelled and cheered super loudly for their first victory...we had our heads down in disappointment...but we knew that we deserved to lose that game...and we did. I walked aside to my head coach who was sitting my himself, seething...telling him, hey...you know we deserved to lose that game right...the whole season we were chirping them...saying to our team oh, they haven't won a single game, we're gonna crush them...it's gonna be a walk in the park. We deserved to lose...we got exactly what we deserved. I remember talking to my friend on the other team that same night and apologizing and also congratulating her...because it was a fun time and I was happy to see them happy, despite being upset that my team lost. It was a needed lesson in humility, pride and cockiness. To not get ahead of yourself, but to be humble in your triumphs and accomplishments. I look back today at that game and laugh...cuz we had no right to be cocky considering we were the 2nd worst team to their worst...we weren't even a good team ourselves. I look back at that game and am happy we lost, we deserved it. I'm glad God knocked me off my pedestal because I got too cocky, too full of myself, too boastful. Any ways, kinda unrelated...one year later, one season later...here we were again, in the same shoes, facing the same team with majority of the same people on both teams...I was coaching this time, my friend who coached the year previously was assisting me. We never spoke it outwardly, but my friend and I both has sour tastes in our mouths just as competitors of sports. But we knew it was just a game, we cheered hard for the other team, encouraged our team to play and work hard...but I know for sure him and I played with a chip on our shoulders, wanting to win extra bad, not for boasting, but just to know we could...and we did...and it was super satisfying inwardly, but it was nice to talk with them after the game and reminisce and share stories and such. I know it was unrelated, but it kinda was at the same time...moral of the main story is anything can  happen, never get cocky...being confident is one thing, but never get boastful about it.

Dear Nice Guy Part 2

Patt 1 http://thebestyouneverheard.blogspot.ca/2015/03/dear-nice-guy.html

Dear fellow nice guys, how are you doing, holding up I hope. I haven't...I've been pretty impatient lately nnd it hasn't been good, it's been unproductive, unfruitful and damaging to my heart. I've been trying to find happiness in all the wrong places. You already know I'm the kinda guy who likes to see both points of views...so I ask myself the question do nice guys really finish last...but at the same time I tell and remind myself deep down, every girl wants to settle down with a nice guy, or most girls at least. Dear fellow nice guy, stay the course, patience can be your best friend but also your worst enemy. I know it's tempting, I know these women are beautiful, but do not...DO NOT jump the gun. DO NOT give in to the first pretty girl that comes knocking on your door. It's hard, I know...you're scared...what if another chance doesn't come, what if she's the one. My fellow brothers...be patient...if she's the one, I promise you'll have multiple opportunities to go after her. Keep your head up, BELIEVE in yourself...one of the biggest things about us nice guys, about me, about you...is we lack confidence. That's something I've been working on and building up. Be patient, but be ready to actively pursue. Don't be that dude who waits around for the girl to throw signs at you and pretty much hand you her number...but don't be the dude going around and chasing skirts and chasing numbers. Be patient, if opportunities are presented, take them, don't be afraid...but be patient as well, opportunities will come. Be patient, but be ready nice guy...your time will come, this I know for sure.

Retreat 2015

To refine something or to be refined is to purify, to remove elements you don't want, simply put...to make better. The theme for retreat this year was refining in the fire. Retreat's always been something that's been hyped and anticipated...but this year the hype wasn't the same as it has been in previous years. Less numbers, less excitement, less buzz...but I kept my head and my hopes up...ready to embrace whatever was put in front of me. And I had a dang good time...sleepless nights, early mornings, insight from kiddies...it definitely met and exceeded my expectations, but then again I set them pretty low. As of late, I feel God's been speaking to me a lot...well trying to, I haven't really been listening let's just say. Retreat hit me hard in a lot of ways...from worship, to the sermons, to listening to the kids in my small group. I get so happy when I see or am around those kiddies...they're so joyful and happy, it just rubs off on you. The sermons and songs surrounding the theme really spoke to me...being refined, striving to be a better christian each and every day. Refining your faith, your commitment, your everything to God. It's felt like a slow summer, but I know God has been good...the summer has been up and down...messy, stressful, fun, happy, all that jazz...one thing that I was reminded of at retreat...is to be still, to know that He is God...and He is good...and He will always come through. I need to refine that passion for God...refine that joy and thirst for more. I know I'm filled to be emptied again...God is always working in my life whether I see it or not...I just had to have faith that everything in my life happens for a reason...times of happiness, times of drought and when I'm in the desert...to be still, to hear his voice...and praise him regardless or where I am or what is happening to me.

Same Thing, Diffferent Perspective

Read this first to fully understand where I'm coming from...
http://thebestyouneverheard.blogspot.ca/2014/11/early-experiences-of-heartbreak.html

Now I understand why people always tell you to sleep on it and maybe things will change tomorrow or you'll see it different. My teacher used to say  write your essay, then proofread it tomorrow and you'll see and read it different and point out mistakes you wouldn't normally point out if you edited it right after you wrote it. Another example would be at church...pastors and preachers using the same verses, but taking away difference things out of it. Couple weeks ago, I visited my teacher and we were just talking about old times...I brought up that moment in the link above...I was like man...I remember missing that serve, losing the game, sitting in the stairwell as you were talking and just having my head down...the whole atmosphere in that stairwell was dreary cuz we were all disappointed we lost. He's like wow, that's what you remember from that season...I remember it so much differently...I remember team dinners, practising till the sun went down and I remember a team that was told they weren't good enough and managed to make it to final 4 and got third, I was like wow...as he said those words...I was like dang, cuz I always thought he was disappointed in us...cuz in all his years coaching at that school...our year, that year...had the most potential to win it all, he always says that himself. But to hear that he remembered it so much differently...is crazy...and eye opening. That you might see something one way...heck, you might even see YOURSELF one way, but others may see that same thing or YOU in a completely different light. You may see yourself as uncool, ugly, unintelligent, whatever...but someone else might see you as caring, friendly and beautiful. It's all about perspective. I don't really have a main point here, it's kinda just a bunch of random things that came to mind. I've never thought I was the most good looking guy...or the coolest guy...or the guy who got the most girls...but hey, someone out there thinks the world of me...and someone out there thinks the world of you too. So whatever negative feeling you're feeling about yourself or whatever...know someone sees it completely differently. That's why I'm such an on the fence kinda guy...I don't like picking sides because I like to see and understand all sides. I'll be gone this weekend at my church's annual retreat, will def update you when I'm back. On a brighter note, my fam booked a vacay in August for a week in Cuba at a resort...super excited, till next time, PEACE.

One Of The Most Encouraging Things You Can Say...

You may or may not agree with me, but that's okay, this is my personal opinion. I feel one of the most encouraging and comforting things you can say...or rather ask someone is "how can I pray for you?" In the past 2 weeks, I've had some very nice and much needled conversations with friends and towards the end, boy of them said...how can I pray for you. And that's encouraging as heck...to know that someone cares about you enough to want to pray for you. It made me think of my church family and how appreciate and thankful I am to have them there for me, checking up on me and making sure I'm okay or haven't like disappeared off the face of the earth. And that's what I think separates me christian friends from my non christian friends...that intimate connection you can create within minutes just my sharing struggles, sins or how God has or is working in your life. Being asked "how can I pray for you" automatically breaks down my walls...for me at least, I just feel inclined to be honest and share with what I'm struggling with so they can pray for me accordingly, that's one thing I love about the church community...cuz of the 2 conversations in the past 2 weeks...one is a close brother in Christ and one is someone I don't know too well, but am cool with. The church community brings together and creates an intimacy between friends, strangers, brothers, sisters...and that's super encouraging to see and experience. I hope you, like these 2 amazing brothers of mine...can and will take that initiative to ask your fellow brothers and sisters how you can pray for them...but on a serious note, don't take that question lightly, if you ask it, mean it, don't just say it for the sake of saying it. Genuinely pray for them, cuz chances are if they're being open and honest with you about whatever it is, they could use the prayer and the encouragement.

"As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." Proverbs 27:17

How Much A Dollar Cost?

"What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?" Mark 8:36

Yesterday at fellowship we were talking about finance...making. spending, saving, lending, borrowing money, all that stuff. This verse came up and we started talking about just the lengths that people will go to to get money...rob a bank, gamble, buy a lottery ticket, sell stuff, it's crazy. But this verse says...what good is it to gain all of these things if it means losing yourself...losing who you are, what you believe in, your morals, what you represent, everything. I started thinking more and more about this verse and how it's relatable to life in so many aspects. Money, power, respect, popularity, fame, boyfriends.girlfriends...what good is it to have all these things but lose your sense of self and reality. Now this verse in context is talking more so about being a disciple of Christ and how following Him means denying ourselves and to deny ourselves to is deny everything in this world and to not hold on or be too hooked onto earthly things, things that won't last forever. So if you take that context and apply it to what I just said...it's kinda along the same lines ish...it's definitely a good reminder for me...to not get caught up in money, nice clothes, girls, how simply how I'm perceived by people. What good is it go have money, girls, fancy cars and clothes if it means losing myself, who I am, what I represent and believe in, y'know. Slowly learning to remind myself to find happiness in the things already around me and to just go with the flow with whatever else comes my way.

Won't You Take Me To Funkytown?

I don't know if it;s just me...but you ever that feeling weird...like in a funk...you're not feeling a specific mood. You're feeling a bunch of moods at the same time...and it's weird...you just kinda sit there blanking out like uh, okay. I was clearing out space on my phone and I saw that text messages were taking up a lot of space, so I decided to delete some and in the process began reading old conversations...boy was that a bad idea. I started feeling so many different types of ways...conversations with ex girlfriends, former close friends, friend's ex girlfriends...just a whole lot of interesting conversations had me feeling a slew of emotions...happy, sad, angry, regret, you name it. I'm definitely in a weird phase right now because I have so much time on my hands I literally have no idea what to do with it...so all I do is chill...and that's when my mind begins to wander all over the place. Man...I started reading conversations with my ex...geez...started reading conversations with girls I was trying to date...geez...read conversations with friends I no longer see eye to eye with...that stuff stings...but it also hits a soft spot you know. I'm feeling real funky right now...night times are the worst...I've been staying up super late as of late...and it's not productive lol...all this free time is actually getting to me...dang.

Man I just reread this after posting it...sorry if I don't make a lot of sense lol, it makes sense it my head, but sometimes I can't put it into words...apologies.

You Are Not Alone

It's 1 am atm...and if you're up reading this, know you're not alone. If you read this at a later time...what's on your mind right now...school, work, relationships, finance, whatever it may be, you're not alone. I remember in my 2nd year, I've told you the story of how I failed multiple courses and saw my life slowly spiral downward right in front of me. I was lost...did not know what I wanted to do in terms of school, staying in the same program or switching...and more so what ate at me really bad was what was I going to do after school. I've always told myself I didn't wanna be one of those kids who goes to university for one thing and finds a job afterwards that's totally unrelated. This post is inspired by a conversation I had a couple years ago....when I had taken the 2nd semester of that year off, to figure out things. I remember venting to a friend...after failing these few couples, I don't know if what I wanted to do going into university is what I still want or should do. The confusion and the feeling of being unsure of what I wanted to do after school ate at the depths of my heart to no ends. And as simple as it may sound...he comforted me by saying you're not alone. Other people feel this way...other people have doubts that what they're doing university is what they want to do for the rest of their life, other people have doubts whether they're in the right program, the right job, whatever. A lot of people will graduate and have completely no idea what they want to do for the rest of their lives. It made me think back to high school...grade 12, seeing everyone pick their majors...seeing kids who've known what they wanted to do since grade 9...and here I was, university applications due soon and I had no idea what major I wanted to take, what job I wanted to do in the future...and definitely no idea where I saw myself in 5-10 years. That conversation gave me so much comfort...and today,it gives me inspiration. I used to get super down when life tossed me some real hard obstacles...but everyone deals with hard obstacles...everyone fails, everyone falls, everyone gets pushed to the point where they're at rock bottom. I'm here to tell you you're not alone...whether you're in high school not knowing what you wanna do in university or you're in university not knowing what you wanna do post grad...it's okay. Heck, even if you've been working for quite some time and still sometimes doubt if your job is the right one for you, it's okay. If you're stressing about finding a boyfriend or girlfriend...or wondering if the person you're with is the person you're going to marry, you're not alone...everyone has doubts and worries. You're not alone, we all fear the unknown, that's apart of life..it's how we grow. I was listening to Wale's album The Album About Nothing and throughout the album he uses skits from the show Seinfeld as well as Jerry Seinfeld himself talking throughout the album...one thing he says is...growth is meant to be scary, you can't be ready for it...because it's growth, it's meant to be new. But that's how we learn, we learn from experience, by doing...so whatever you're struggling with today, know you're not alone...other people have been in your shoes and walked the same steps as you and you know what, they made it to the finish line...and so will you. Trust in the process, trust in the plan, trust in yourself.

Childhood Revisited

I was watching this episode of Recess...it's actually hilarious...called The Experiment. The gang hear a story about this dude's big brother kissing a girl and liking it and he's like oh that's the future and they\re freaking out that they're gonna end up liking the opposite gender hahaha. It kills me...but man...back in the day it was such an innocent time lol...back when guys did their own thing...girls did their own thing...but now the future really is here LOL...boys kissing girls, girls kissing boys. I actually love this show...brings back so many memories...like when someone would jinx you and you couldn't say anything LOL...or the rule about no snitching, NO MATTER WHAT. This show legit touches on everything you've ever wondered or thought about when you were a kid lol...what does the teacher's lounge look like? What do they do outside of school? It also reminds me how scared of the upper grade kids I was when I was young lol...also how picture day was such a big deal. Dressing up, doing your hair and looking all nice. One of the funniest but relatable ones is the episode of the new kid...just how hard it is being a new kid, leaving everything, no one wanting to associate you cuz you're the new kid. Man, I've seen this show so many times...but I love rewatching it, it's short and sweet, but so entertaining lol. And ultimately, like this show is titled...the most important thing when you were a kid is recess...just chilling with your friends and having fun.

What's Your Motivation?

So a couple weeks ago, I was at the gym working legs...and no lie, the weights were kicking my butt. I was doing squats...and I was hating every moment of it...wanted to quit so bad. That's when it hit me...I started thinking about my friends...about how competitive I am, wanting to constantly better myself and better than them, not in a boastful way, but in like an improving way you know. I look up to my friends...in a lot of things...working out, basketball, whatever...and it pushes me to keep up with them or surpass them. I then started thinking about my enemies...or the people I don't really like...I think about surpassing them in every way...I think about the hard work they put in, them trash talking me, telling me I'm not good enough...and that pushes me to push and give it my all. I think about all the times I've been told I'm not good enough, I didn't make the cut, to come back next time. I think about elementary school, not making the basketball team. I think about high school, not making the volleyball or basketball teams. I think about dislocating my knee. All these things push me and drive me to make myself better each and every day. To prove to everyone and more so to prove to myself hey, you're not only good enough, you can be head and shoulders better than everyone...IF you're willing to put in the work. I won't lie...I won't lie...my friends and the people around me give me so much motivation...and it's in a positive way...say basketball, I think about specific people, friends, peers...about pushing myself to get to their level, to be better than them . I think about coaches and teachers who told me I wasn't good enough...it pushes me to work hard and let them know they were wrong. So thank you...for doubting me, for not believing me...but more importantly for pushing me to become better.

The Funky Fresh Is Back In The Flesh

If you don't recognize it, the title is from Fresh Prince. When Will just moves to Bel Air and starts to get accustomed to the rich lifestyle, big house, fancy food and such...he realizes he's lost who he is and forgot where he came from and what he represents and believes in. This is kinda where I'm at atm...I know I've been mia...and when I am here...I'm still not really here...my posts were hella depressing...okay not depressing...but emotional...like damn, man the heck up. I'm sorry..I've been so slacks...I've been half hearted...and I've been all over the place. But the funky fresh is back in the flesh with a vengeance homie. For a short time being...I was sprung...hella sprung...this girl had me all emotional...I'm not going to get into it cuz it's honestly a really stupid story, I felt like I was in high school again. Catching feelings hard, falling flat on my face...hard, writing sappy poems, over thinking and over analysing...man, girls will made a guy do stupid stuff. I guess now I understand...well semi understand guys who'll go the distance and back to pleaser their girlfriends...who'll ditch their friends...or spend loads of money on them...girls have a weid power man...I dunno. But not even that...it's been a weird time for me...this whole softball thing has got me feeling all sorts of ways too...some days are good, some days are bad. It wasn't until today...sharing my devo and having my friend ask to pray for me...that I remembered...or was reminded...it isn't about the situation you're in...but how you handle it. So even if you're in a bad situation, make the best of it...find the positives in the negative. That's always been how I've tried to see things...but I've been so lost and blurred lately...everything has been super complicated...the only things I really understand in life atm are the gym and basketball LOL. It's always funny that summer, the time you're supposed to be the most care free and stress free gives me such a headache lol...school is just school work...but summer man...who knew there'd be so much baggage...but...I'm back, or at least I'm getting there...with the help of good company...and trusting that God will guide me through whatever the summer has planned for me. I'm looking at things in a new, but familiar light...trying to be positive with everything that's given to me...and patient with the things that I want and hope for. Thanks for bearing with me and thanks for always giving me that support by simply visiting this blog.

Peace