So today at fellowship, we had a chance to break off into groups and share a bit and just chill...one question that I really thought about was if you had a question for God, what would it be?
I used to always wanna ask God why do bad things happen...or more specifically why do bad things happen to good people while like criminals get set free or innocent people die...things like that you know. But I guess the context of my question was moreso like oh God I serve in church a lot, I do good things, why do bad things happen to me. And it's so ironic and my friend who was sharing something to me told me that God rewards those he loves...but he also disciplines those he loves. God uses trials and temptations and obstacles to teach us...so when we think we're failing or about to fall...know that God is teaching you, moulding you, chiselling you...to his likeness. My question then shifted to...what is my purpose in this life...or what is your plan for me God? What am I gonna do in the future? What am I gonna do after school? Am I going to find a job that's related to all this studying and reading I'm doing? What do you have planned for my family...my brother...,my aunts, uncles, cousins, relatives. Where and what am I going to be like in 5 years...10 years...will I have a stable job...a wife...a family. When or if I get married...what will my wife be like...have I met her already. There's all these things I want to know...about God's plan for me...and my future...but I know and I tell myself it's like reading the end of a novel before you even start it...you ruin the ending for yourself and yeah you can read the story and the character will go through all these tough times and trials, but you know they're going to be okay cuz you read the ending. I guess it's a constant reminder to myself that life is liek that....that it would be no fun and pointless to know the ending...all I know is that I'm going to be okay...and that God has a plan for me and it's going to be beautiful. But sometimes...things just get real frustrating...like my 2 biggest things are always what am I going to do in the future...and who is my future wife. I guess I'm just at that age where I'm thinking or should be thinking about those things After school what's going to happen...moving out, getting a job, supporting my parents, starting a family. And then a wife...a girl who I can see myself spending the rest of my life with...someone I can grow old with...someone I will grow in my walk with Christ, someone I will sacrifice for and put above myself...someone I will protect and love...I trust you God...you've never left me, you've never failed me...and I know you never will.
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