We Need To Talk

Let's just chat guys, I feel like once in a while, I just need to talk to y'all you know...no stories, no venting or trying to be all motivational, just talking to you guys. I have so many posts lined up for y'all it's crazy man, I started writing one just now, but then couldn't get into the emotional mind state, starting writing a different one, same thing...so I'm just like whatever, I'm just gonna talk to y'all. School has been such a killer these past couple of months, I won't lie I've been skipping class a bit more in November, like it's almost winter break...cut me some slack lol. So many essays, so many seminar discussions, so many iced coffees and a whole lot of sleep deprivation. I'm almost there tho, the halfway point is in plain sight. What else has been going on...honestly, school has consumed the most of my thoughts to be honest. The occasional free time I get is spent giving my mind a break or chilling with my friends. I haven't touched my xbox since maybe like September. I also haven't spoken to many of my 'friends' in a long while...months. Don't get me wrong, I've some with some people and on some occasions, but it's like, you throw a ball against a wall and it doesn't come all the way, it kinda just slowly bounces towards you, so you're just like whatever...does that analogy make sense? I tell all my friends that life's been moving real fast, but real slow at the same time Real slow in a sense where days go my slow, classes go by slow. But it goes by fast in a sense where I feel like I don't have enough time sometimes to study or do my assignments. It goes by fast when I look at the weeks ahead and the stuff I have to do or the stuff that's going on and I'm just like wow that's creeping up pretty fast. You wanna know something weird today...so I was kinda looking around my room and just chilling today when I started looking at my arms...my tattoos specifically...and it kinda hit me like a jolt, I was like, wow...these are permanent, these writings, pictures, works...are a permanent part of my body. Like part of me I guess hasn't let that sunk in fully because it's become like a part of me, I can't see myself without it cuz it's always on me from when I wake up and brush my teeth in the mirror to when I go to sleep in bed at night. I laughed then I smiled for a bit, it was a happy feeling...letting this sink in like wow, this is a permanent thing, it's on and with you for the rest of your life...from when you find a girlfriend, a wife, have kids, get a job...it's gonna follow you, and I kinda had this thought in my head where I was looking forward to all of that. Weird eh, I know. Oooh, another thing...I can't wait for the first like big snowfall...just a huge snowstorm, the ground covered in snow, walking around campus, shoveling...just the first couple days of course, after a week, I'll probably be sick of it and wanting to stay in my bed all day. I'll tell you, one thing I'll miss after this year is walking around campus, taking the outdoor paths, being in the library, being in classes, just the school atmosphere. But who knows, I might do more school next year, possibly even at York, or I might just go work. I'm kinda like in a boat right now the paddle's there, but I'm just enjoying the view, the ride and letting the stream take me, letting life take it's course, I think that's been my mentality for a long while. Letting life take it's course, letting God's plan kinda unravel and going with the flow because it's all for a reason. That kinda plays into why I'm always so mellow, chill or as some people would call it "not serious" LOL. Trust me, I understand when the situation calls to be serious, but most of the time, people just wanna laugh, chill and take it easy, if anything, I feel some people are TOO serious you know. Don't take things to heart fam, chill out. But yeah, this was a great conversation, I love talking to y'all, that isn't sarcasm either, I appreciate that you guys are such great listeners, it's dope. Till next time, PEACE.