Hey friends, I know it's been a while, a really long while lol. I was debating what kinda post I wanted to do since it's been so long, I have a bunch of stuff ready for you guys and I'm gonna try to better manage my time and just write posts in bulk so I can just post whenever, all this time I've just been writing them on the day of or on the spot, but with this I can write posts whenever I have motivation and also won't love my train of thought, so yeah...with that, I'm excited to bring back the guest posts and let's not waste any more time and get to today's guest writer.
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I tend to overthink. Hence, todays thoughts for tomorrow as the title for this. I don’t know what it is, but I can’t help but think about all the possible outcomes to every situation, every moment, and things that are going on around me. This isn’t to say I am not living in the moment, but rather I feel too deeply. I’m not sure at this point in my life, if it’s better to feel less, or if it’s better to feel in rich and vivid colours and shades, as well as deep colours. Sometimes my days are vivid as can be, but everything around me feels like black and white. This is not to say black and white is bad, black and white is beautiful. Photographing in black and white is just as intriguing, as an analogy. Rather, some times, some moments, I feel so alive, that I have never felt more rich, not in a monetary value, but as a person, whether my brain and the skies around me are all grey or coloured or clouded.
Some people see me on a regular basis and think I am full of colour, because of what I portray to the world, but deep down inside, I’m not sure what it is, that I feel. I can’t just pinpoint one emotion. We are humans. I feel more than one, so I don’t know how to pick sometimes. When someone asks me how I’m doing, I’m not sure how to answer that always, and I don’t think that’s a bad thing, but I think the pressures of society and the way our generation is, it’s somehow creeping it’s way onto me that it must be an abnormal thing. I refuse to let that take over me; I think in order to grow in a different way, you have to be able to self reflect on yourself, and I think being brutally honest about how you feel or what you are feeling is a really good way. It’s not the easiest, it’s not the cleanest, it’s actually the messiest, but it’s worth it at the end of the day.
The only problem is I might do too much self reflecting. I know that at the end of the day, I can be very blunt with my feelings, because hey that’s how I feel. Why do we feel the need to sugar coat it, or tone things down? Growing up and even throughout early adulthood, I’ve seen multiple situations where people whether close or far from me, either asked others to tone down someone’s feelings or words, or just straight out ignored what someone else was saying or feeling.
People tend to sugar coat the good, to make it look better than it is, and on the other end of the spectrum, people tend to really look down upon anyone going through something sad or bad, tell them all the quick fixes and thing’s they shouldn’t feel, ignoring how the person truly says they are feeling. They teach us to hide our feelings and emotions, and not speak about it. They tell us we are seeking attention, when all we really want is someone to listen, to truly care, to open up and be true. They tell you to be happy, but yet they have not spent a minute inside your confused, empty, full, beautiful and tragic mind at times, and lively soul that lives within you. Be you always. I sure am.
