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Rodmond - RT - RTtheRealest

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything." James 1:2-4

"Whatever you do in life, make sure you follow your heart. Nobody can see your vision like you can see it."

A personal blog, an unfiltered and uncensored place of expression, a personal journal.

EST 12/15/2009

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

From The Heart: Where'd You Go Pt. 2

I've come to the realization....that maybe we aren't as close as I thought we were. That maybe this whole thing was me giving you my all and you kinda just taking it and putting it aside. You keep telling me one thing, but showing me another. You say you care and that I mean a lot to you but I don't see you show it. You say we don't talk enough but you don't make an effort to talk to me. I'm an easy jealous type....not only if I had a girlfriend but also girl friends (friends who are girls). So yeah it hurts when you reach out to your other guy friends and not me, when you msg/text/skype your other guy friends and not me. And you really have the nerve to call me out and say we don't talk enough...c'mon son. When I take a stroll down memory lane, it's always me coming to you, wanting to talk, looking for advice, looking for comfort....it's never vice versa. Or...it's me coming to you cuz I sense something's wrong and I ask you what's wrong, I don't stop until you tell me. I feel like I'm always the one that approaches you, which is why we haven't been seeing eye to eye lately, and maybe it's just me, but you don't even seem phased by this at all, or maybe you just don't notice these things like I do, or maybe you just don't view me important enough to see it as a big deal. I dunno man, when I heard you might be res'ing for university...it hurt...to know that though we weren't talking at the time...that I had to find out from someone else, who proceeded to say "oh, you didn't know?"....yeah that kinda hurts. Right now, I feel like we're head to head, my cards are face down and you can see my strategy...while your cards are covered and there's a wall preventing me from knowing anything about you. Lately, I've found comfort in others, and I'm happy...sometimes I feel like all this up, down, left, right drama isn't really worth it when the person doesn't reciprocate all the care, emotion and love that you do.

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