Self-Determination

So a big concept that I've been learning about in school is this idea of self-determination. So I'm studying to be a social service worker and when you're dealing with clients, the idea of self-determination is that each person has the ability to make their own decisions and control their own life. So as a social service worker, it's not about like giving dope advice or being a good listener as important as those things are...but it's about giving all the information and equipping your client enough tht they can make a decision for themselves. Obviously there's a lot of variables that come into play but I don't wanna get too into the little details. So this is something I've been struggling because it's something I've been seeing or like applying into my daily life. Now obviously when you give your friend or even anybody advice, so much comes into play like your own opinion, biases, perspective and knowledge of the person and situation. But from a social service worker standpoint, like non of that should be part of the equation when you're helping the client, it's all about okay here\s all the information, here are your options, what do you wanna do kinda thing. But as a friend talking to another friend, obviously the things I say are influenced by what I know of the person and my own persona perspective. For example, I give my friend some advice, they make their decision and I'm like okay that's dumb don't do that, or I'll give advice to them to try to influence their decision to the one that I think is right. Whereas in social service work it's like nah you give them the unbiased information and they make the decision for themselves and you go about your day whether you agree with their decision or not. The kinda conflict for me arises when say I\m talking to someone going through a breakup and they say oh what should I do? Obviously if I know the person and the situation, my bias influences the advice I give to the person...say it's like okay your partner was a dick, they don't deserve you, don't get back with them, but you also have the option to do so if you want...see how in that situation my advice is like hella biased Whereas from like a social worker standpoint it's like okay here are your options, here are the pros and cons of each option, make a decision and whether I agree or disagree with the decision it's their life and their choice. Obviously I don't mean or intend to look at my friends or people as clients, but I couldn't help but think to myself like well is the advice that I'm giving really what's best for the person. Like are they coming to their own conclusion or am I kinda guiding their decision based on my own perspective and biases. That's kinda been my struggle lately...like is this what's best for them or is this what I think is best for them? Cuz yeah you might think that they\re making the “wrong” decision, but it's their life and who are you to say what's right and wrong for them. And even with that, people deserve that opportunity to live and to learn and fail and experience their own ups and downs. I just kinda find myself thinking about this concept in the back of my mind when I'm in conversation and especially when people ask me for advice or ask me what they should do in certain situations. Like I've caught myself mid advice like wait, is this really what's best for them or is this what I think is best for them based on my own values and morals. So I dunno...it's an interesting thought cuz I wanna give good advice but I also want people to be able to come to their own conclusions and decisions rather than me going well that's bad so you know you shouldn't do it. I hope this makes sense and doesn't sound like too nerdy or whatever. I've just found myself in a lot of conversations with people about their life and not necessarily life altering decisions but still big decisions and I don't want or feel like I should be telling people what to do or saying what's right and wrong because everyone has like a different standard or measuring stick for that...I'd rather try to like outline okay so here is what's going on, here are all your options, here are the pros and cons, how do you wanna move forward? Obviously it'll differ from person to person and some people you might just have to tell them straight up that's dumb lol...but it was just a good kinda reminder for me like hey you don't necessarily know what's best for everyone, let them figure it out for themselves even if that means they might trip and stumble a couple times. But anyways, till next time...PEACE.