Unrealistic Expectations

So one thing I've learned through all of the guest posts and the ask the audience posts is that you can't project your own expectations onto other people. Now what do I mean by that, well this blog has shaped me into a very open and honest person, like there's obviously there's a part of my life I (try to) keep private but a lot of what happens and what I go through end sup on the blog. When it comes to guest posts or the ask the audience posts, I can't and shouldn't expect people do be the same way as me when I'm writing my posts, but there were times when I did expect that. I would ask people with the expectation or at least high hope that they would be super honest, vulnerable and open and when they gave me something that didn't meet my expectations, I was def a little let down...but in reality not everyone is like that, not everyone is comfortable talking about these kinds of things and not everybody wants to. I learned this through a conversation with a friend and he told me he just broke up with his girlfriend, I was in a hurry so I was like hey lemme text you later and we can talk about it if you want. He found me 10 minutes later and he was like hey I appreciate the offer but I'm good, if I need to talk to somebody I'll message you tho. I was kinda taken back...I guess in my mind I was like yeahhhh open up to me, share your burdens, let me helpppp you LOL not really that intense, but maybe to some degree I was like oh man, I was really ready to hear him out and help him out, but then it kinda hit me that day like maybe he just didn't wanna talk about it or didn't wanna talk about it with you. Everyone is at and has different levels of comfort and openness and I shoudn't project and expect people to match my levels just cuz I'm super open about stuff that most people probably keep to themselves lol. In that same sense, when I would ask people questions for the ask the audience posts, I really did expect like deep, hardcore, personal answers lol but some people gave me super short and super generic answers, I was definitely disappointed but then I was like well I can't force people to share things they don't want to or don't feel comfortable sharing. Even what I'm learning in school for social service work, a lot of it is like well you can't force the client to share anything that they don't want to...let them lead the conversation, if they wanna talk about rainbows and butterflies all day who are you to stop them, you can't force them to talk about their struggles or what's bothering them, they'll share as much as they want and when they want. And so I've found myself doing that in conversations...with friends, on dates...like I never wanna probe too much or ask too personal questions too fast (tho sometimes I can't help myself lol), but I think I've learned and am learning to kinda just roll with the energy that the other person gives me...if they wanna talk about school or work or sports I'm down, or if they wanna talk about life and their personal struggles I'm game too. I think it's definitely a skill to be able to like read the flow of the conversation and just roll with it. Imagine it's like a super chill and fun conversation about your childhoods and suddenly you're like yeah so my goldfish died yesterday LOL...anyways, on that note sorry it's been a while...school's been a little hectic/busy and I've always been procrastinating, but it feels like this semester has flown by and it's already almost December, the new year is right around the corner, COVID is still kicking our butts, some of us are in lockdown, the world is a crazy place right now...the last thing on my mind is school and work, but life doesn't take a pause, still gotta do what you gotta do...maybe I'll give y'all an update on life next post...see y'all soon, PEACE!