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"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything." James 1:2-4

"Whatever you do in life, make sure you follow your heart. Nobody can see your vision like you can see it."

A personal blog, an unfiltered and uncensored place of expression, a personal journal.

EST 12/15/2009

Monday, July 17, 2017

Retreat 2017

Retreat 2014

Wow, so it's super crazy and interesting reading retreat posts over the years...my mentality going in and stuff...remembering exactly what I did, who I chilled with and such. Lemme say first of all...after a long weekend of being around people all weekend all the time, it's nice to just be by myself and have some alone time to kinda balance my insides lol. Bro, so I read last year's retreat post and I apparently got a combined total of 8 hours of sleep...fam, this year I only got a total of like 6 hours of sleep. So lemme go ahead and say that this year...going into retreat, I was excited and looking forward to it. I was more comfortable with all the people going and as well I had some close friends to fall back on and chill with if everyone was busy. Going into retreat this year, I was excited for many reasons...the speaker we had was dope, overall all the people going were hella chill and fun to be around, people I'm comfortable with. The first day is always kinda eh cuz you essentially go there just to sleep. We had our first session and some small group time, very general and warm up stuff since it was only the first day. The first night I didn't end up sleeping till 6 am...I ended up just chilling with a couple of different people, having some real good conversations...it ended up being a super emotional night...and weekend in general...not for me...I kinda just sat back and took everything in and listened whenever people needed me to listen. It was cool cuz by the time it hi like 5 am, the sun started to rise so my boy and I went outside and kinda just walked around for a bit...until all the bugs started coming for us that is LOL. Day 2 was a real long day...I had to gt up at like 8 ish for breakfast...but the fatigue and lack of sleep didn't really hit me till nighttime. Throughout the day, it was pretty standard stuff, our second session, group photos, some group games and free time. I will say this...I had a conversation with my boy during dinner and we were talking about past retreats...how sometimes it was kinda boring because the people around us weren't really bout it...they would sit around during games, wouldn't participate and stuff. But this year he was like man...these kids are really contagious...their energy, happiness and excitement...made me really wanna get into the games and all that stuff...and I was like yeah bro, I'm telling you, these kids are hella fun to be around. So that was really dope to hear from him. So the last night session was when the lack of sleep finally started hitting me...bro every time I blinked or had to close my eyes, it felt like I was gonna fall asleep LOL. Come nighttime, it was dope to see like a good 20-25 people chilling in one room playing board games and just being around each other...how often does that get to happen? OHHHH...on that note...bro, so our church was like...do not bring board games or card games this year...they made that an actual rule...saying it distracts from fellowship and stuff...BRUHHHHHH. All I'll say is...do you think the same thing would happen if there weren't any cards or board games at retreat? Tbh, I think everybody would be doing their own thing...watching movies on their laptops, playing pool, taking walks, maybe even sleeping earlier. Shout out to my dude the milk man tho LOL. But forreal, even that first night before the cards and games were brought out...after the first session a bunch of us were sitting in the common room looking at each other like so guys...what do you wanna do? So yeah...it's like any party right...you gotta have games of some sort...so people at least have an option to do something if they want...talking with each other is always going to be an option, but when it's the only option, it's like shoot...you feel forced to find someone to talk to otherwise you're on your own. Games at least give you that icebreaker to talk to people you might not normally talk to. Sorry for this kinda mini rant...I'm just not a fan of rules that don't make any sense or have no logic behind them you know...but are expected to be followed simply cuz they're rules...yeah I sound like some sort of anti-authority figure right now don't I lol....whoops. Before I went to be the second day tho...a couple of us guys just chilled in someone's room and had some good conversations with each other...you know, guy talk...it was dope because I got to hear from this one guy I don't normally talk to on a personal level. Other than that, I ended up sleeping at like 4 am that night...literally I somewhat had an intention of just staying up all night LOL...but most people ended up sleeping earlier, so I was like alright, better sleep than be completely dead tomorrow. That last day...few of us had intentions of going to mcdonalds for breakfast because the breakfast that they serve is kinda lame lol...I ended up sleeping till like 9 ish and went straight to the first session. The last day, you could really see everyone just super tired and exhausted lol, all the lack of sleep finally caught up to me cuz I was so out of it the entire day. But overall...I'm thankful for retreat this year...it almost didn't happen fro what I heart. (I'm glad I got to have the conversations that I did with the people that I did. I'm thankful to God for giving me the energy to get through the weekend and the messages. Out of everything that was said, the one thing that will stick with me is when the pastor said that "failure is part of the journey" because it resonates with me so much. In our small groups, he was with us and he talked about how it's all about baby steps...like you're in the darkness and you have a flashlight and can only see what's in front of your feet....but we as people want to shine the light on the whole thing and what's like super far away from us...to be sure we're on the right track, not going the wrong way and such...but either way...you're still going towards the same destination. He gave a good analogy about using the stairs vs the elevator...how they both go to the same destination...but we take the elevator because we wanna get there quicker, but the stairs still leads you to the same destination. He was saying how lies always take the elevator, but the truth takes the stairs...so in the end, despite how slow it is...the truth always catches up with the lies. I dunno, it was just real cool to be able to talk to him one on one, hear from him and get to know him as a person and have him pray for each one of us individually. Definitely a retreat I won't forget anytime soon...till next time, peace out.

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