Hey so remember like a month ago when I was like yeah...I'm gonna start doing these a top 10 list kinda thing each week or at least as consistently as I'll try to be...yeah, I don't remember that either LOL. But I was serious about WANTING to do it, that's for sure. One thing I've realized after experiencing it myself when reading other people\s blogs is that WOW, long posts are HELLA boring...okay not entirely, but I mean I've noticed when posts are super long, I usually skim through or read very quickly...unless the title or content is VERY interesting, most of the time...as I'm sure you've probably done to long posts on this blog...we skim or skip cuz...it's too long fam. So that's why I decided to cut the Top 10 into a Top 5. I've never considered myself a ladies man, but I've been on my share of first dates and I've also been on my share of second dates, so I'd like to think I'm doing something right lol, but then again this is all subjective, everyone is different. These are just my opinions and some tips that may or may not help you. Boys, feel free to take notes...girls, feel free to make a checklist for your next first date.
First dates are really important...it determines if there'll be a second date and it also determines if there's potential in this pairing. So yeah, here are 5 (hopefully) helpful tips for y'all.
1. SET THE TONE
Setting the kind of tone you want during your first date is very important. Setting the tone includes things like what you're wearing, where you're going and what you're doing. My opinion on setting the tone is to keep things as light and as casual as possible. First dates are like getting your feet wet, when you're at the pool or the beach, you don't jump into the water right away...you dip your feet into the water to see how cold or hot it is...you're feeling it out, same thing for first dates. You don't wanna be too serious too fast. As for attire, even tho we're keeping in casual, try to look nice..clean up a bit, dress for the occasion. I've never been a fan of movies or loud places for first dates. First of all, you don't talk during the movies...and isn't that the point of the date, to get to know the girl? As for loud places...well you won't be able to hear each other. I personally enjoy going for bubble tea, coffee, dessert, something where it's chill and y'all can get to know each other. I specifically say these things instead of lunch or dinner because they're light hearted, you can grab them to go, it's just a chill atmosphere where as with lunch or dinner, there's lots of room for awkwardness and silence. If you wanna spruce it up a bit...activities are always good for first dates, depending on your date of course. Mini golf. pool, pottery, painting, rock climbing, parks...all these things create distraction and eliminate the dead space y'feel...you're always doing something and there's so much room for conversation along the way. Whether you're already friends or she's a stranger, setting the setting the tone is very important.
2. PAY FOR THE BILL
Wow so tip 1 was a lot longer than I had hoped, but it is the most important and the rest of these tips all coincide with setting the tone, so in trying to keep this post short, the rest of these will hopefully not be as long. But yeah pay the bill (you may or may not agree with this)...this coincides with tip 1. The more casual, the more cost efficient it'll also likely to be. You asked her out (most likely), now if she declines and offers to pay, ISSA TRAP, jokes, but kindly refuse and be a good guy. Now if she REEEEALLY insists on paying, good luck with that one LOL. For girls...despite what I said in this tip...still offer to pay, it's common courtesy you know. I had one girl LITERALLY slide me the bill when it came...that was the last time we spoke LOL. Ladies, if he asks to split the bill. he's probably not a real one, nor is into you unfortunately.
3. BE CHIVALROUS
Chivalry is not dead my friends. I'm serious, don't laugh. My first date with this one girl...I waited outside my car, she came out and I opened the door for her and she was like wow no one's ever done that for me before. At the end of the night, walk her to the door fam, I don't care if it's right there...it leaves room for you to try to hold her hand, maybe go for that first kiss...think about it. If not (which I highly recommend you do), AT LEAST, wait until she goes inside before zooming away...so many times I've seen guys drive away before the girl or anybody they're driving home is inside yet...that's irresponsible. ALWAYS be prepared...this means umbrellas, long sleeves or jackets in case it rains or she gets cold...those kinda things. It was raining one night and so I walked up to my date's door with an umbrella and walked her to my car and opened it for her as she got in. Little things matter boys...be a gentleman, not a dick.
4. LISTEN MORE THAN YOU SPEAK
Girls in general like a good listener, I've learned that first hand. Listen intentionally.What does that mean? With purpose...listen because you care and want to know. Not like when your parents tell you to clean your room, you're listening, but you don't really care. Little details are important my friends. I can't tell you the amount of times I've brought up random little details about my dates or random girl friends and they went wow, I can't believe you remembered that or hit me with an aww that's so sweet you remembered. Little details are key my friends...and that comes when you listen to what they are saying intently and purposefully.
5. BE YOURSELF
Lastly boys...and girls, be yourself...forreal. It'll help the filter process for one. You'll also see if there's any potential in this. If you're pretending to be someone you're not, to like something you don't...you're only setting yourself up for failure down the line. If you're real...as weird, dumb, stupid or lame as you might be...if she likes you, at least she likes you for you...and not cuz you pretended to be like this or to like this. That goes for any kind of relationship or friendship...be yourself, it's too underrated nowadays.
I hope that was helpful or at least entertaining for y'all...I did my best to keep it on the shorter side...hope you enjoyed reading this, till next time...peace out,
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