Hey y’all, so I wrote this a couple of days ago and hesitated on posting it cuz well...like the post will talk about, I was scared of the response it would teceive, but it is what it is...control what you can control, and don’t let what you can’t bother you...enjoy.
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I think this is something I’ve struggled with all my life and it’s something I still struggle with. This idea of being accepted and liked. And this goes further and way beyond just girls but the friends and the people you surround yourself with. Whether it’s how people perceive me, this blog or the things I say and do. Whether you think I’m hella corny, not funny, way too dramatic or over the top lol. I get way too wrapped up in what people think. Do they hate it do they love it, I don’t think it’s something I can escape or something that ever goes away...no matter how many blog anniversaries I celebrate or how many views the blog gets...I always struggle with what y’all think and if y’all like me or not because I wanna be likable...that’s why I try to push out interesting content, funny stories, waaaay too many posts about girls. I think that’s something any kind of content creator goes through. I’m big on watching people’s vlogs and stuff and it’s something they always talk about because it’s right in their face. People commenting on their daily lives, their personalities, the things they say and do. And I know I’m far from that, but it’s somewhat in the same lane in that I put my life out here...for y’all to see, read, laugh, criticize, enjoy, whatever it may be. I can’t help but expect the negative to come along with the positives...just because a post blows up doesn’t mean it’s a good thing, what if people think it’s dumb or stupid and are like yo you should read this it’s so dumb. Those are the random and outlandish things I think about.
But eventually and like always...I get a moment to myself and am able to calm down and reflect (cuz if you know me you’ll know the freak outs are usually followed my moments of realization) and tell myself why’re you stressing over things you can’t control. And that’s exactly what it all is...in the same way I can’t force a girl to love me, I can’t force y’all to like me, I can’t force y’all to think my posts are funny or interesting. It’s not a battle I can win and that’s why I say and try to remind myself that this blog...it really is for just me. A place of expressing and comfort for me to just say whatever I want and need...knowing that whatever response comes is out of my control, all I can do is just keep doing my thing and if you dig the posts and mess with the vibe that I put out then that’s dope...but if not, I’ll probably stress about it but eventually realize what’s the point cuz it’s something I can’t control. I can’t jump out of your phone or computer screen and slap you twice across the face for not liking my posts...that’s the cycle of life and I just gotta deal with it. Sorry for the whole schpeel (is that the right spelling) but it was something that crossed my mind and something that I realized bothered me more than it actually did.
Edit: So I wrote this yesterday and rereading it right now I just wanna say something to you and also to myself. People are gonna feel some type of way about you no matter who you are, what you do and/or what you say. Always remind yourself of that when you get caught up in the hype. You can be a great person, do amazing things but somewhere, somehow, someone will try to find a way to put your light out, let it burn even brighter...keep doing you.
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