Standards

So I'm reminded of a conversation I had with a friend after he brought it up recently and was like yo something that you said stuck out to me, it was something along the lines of like “why am I trying to change myself to meet someone else's standards?” I remember exactly what I was talking about, but I feel like that statement or question can be applied to so many different fields and aspects of life. Everyone has different standards for different things, some higher and some lower and it all depends and derives from like our upbringing, our surroundings and our environment. I might go out and eat a burger from a random spot and think to myself well damn, this is the best burger I've ever had in my life. But if Gordon Ramsay goes to that same spot and has that burger, he might just be like eh...I've had better. What I'm trying to say is everyone's standards of something are different and you can't really go off something based on that or compare yourself or change yourself because of someone else's standards. I'll give you a more concrete and real example which I've probably shared with y'all in bits. So very long story short, one time a close friend called me immature and it just really stuck with me. Like it ate at me cuz in my mind I was like nah, I think I'm like just funny, relatable and down to earth or simple. But the more I thought about it, I would kinda keep asking myself...well am I immature? And it started to affect like my behaviour and how I talked and presented myself. I would be very careful with like what I said or how I said it for fear of coming off as “immature”. I started to ask questions like well what is maturity? Is it dressing in a suit and tie and being all clean cut? Is it using big words that no one knows and not using slang? Like when I say it ate at me, it really ate at me lol and I was like searching for answers, what is maturity and how do I change myself to become “mature”. After a while, I kinda realized and asked myself...why am I stressing so hard based on one person's assessment of my character? There are so many people who think like I'm funny for example...or super chill and easy to talk to...or really relatable and nice to be around...but I kept focusing on this one person's opinion and trying to meet her standards. It was really unhealthy for me because I felt like I couldn't be myself around her. Even when I had that conversation with my friend and shared with him all of this, it was like the first time I really vocalized and expressed it outwardly and it felt really good because I was so used to internalizing it or writing it on the blog. All in all, what I'm trying to say is that everyone has different standards of what it means to be mature, cool, rich...you name it...and it's honestly impossible to meet everyone's standards and unhealthy for you to do so. You gotta be happy and comfortable with who you are and embrace those who embrace you. If somebody is that critical of you or makes you feel like you can't be yourself around them, then maybe you gotta cut that negativity out of your life. Be yourself, that's all anyone can really ask of you, till next time...peace.