Random Thoughts

Is it weird to feel like I don't have enough time and I have too much time at the same time? Somebody put that in a verse, it sounds fire. Anyways, if you follow the blog this is something I did back in the day to just kinda spitball at you guys...lately, the blog's been slacking yeah yeah we get it...but fam, the well is empty, it's dry...I honestly have nothing to talk about lol, nothing major's been going on. So instead of just going ghost, why not just hit you guys with everything that I HAVE been thinking about, but not enough to make a post about lol. For one, I'm taking it that there's only a month left in my first semester at college, time literally flies. I feel like time moves really fast when you think of it in alarger context...like in my one semester for one course, there's only 12 classes...take that in, yeah it's once a week over a 3 month period but to think that you digest everything, do all the tests and projects and assignments in 12 classes is pretty crazy. And at work they give you your schedule like a few weeks or sometimes even a month ahead, it makes you look at time in a larger context. Speaking of school, looking for a placement is probably the only thing I'm really stressed about atm because I gotta find one for December. Searching for placements has reminded me that rejection is a natural and healthy part of life. I had an interview for one yesterday that I really wanted but I found out today I didn't get in. It's funny cuz I don't really get too nervous about the actual interview, I've gotten gotten comfortable with it...but yeah, I was kinda bummed at first, but at the end of the day it is what it is and I just gotta get back on the horse and keep searching for placements...rejection is a natural part of life. Oh yeah, so on the flip side of not having enough time...I feel like I have so much time on my hands in the sense that I find myself thinking a lot...about random people, events, situation,s, circumstances. I think about people a lot...and of course memorably events and situations...which are often linked to people. Sometimes I miss people, I think about what went wrong, what changed. I think about fun road trips, nights out and great conversations. On the flip side to change...it made me think about how much stays the same, consistent, it just evolves. I think about being at my current job for over a year and seeing all the faces that have come, gone and are still here...I think about my parents or people I know who;ve been with the same person for a lengthy amount of time, it's crazy when we think about change we forget how crazy it is that some things can stay the same for a long time too. So my car battery recently at a gas station with my parents and long story short all of our friends were busy or didn't know how to help that we started asking people at the gas station for help and this young boy in high school helped us out no questions asked. It made me think of the other time my car battery died...calling all my friends and they were busy, my parents didn't know what to do, I was stuck by myself at the mall. I called my friend and he said he could help, but he was in north york with his girlfriend, he said to call him back if I couldn't find anybody...I tried, but couldn't...so this guy left his girlfriend and drove from north york to help boost my battery, damn. It made me think of the time I got a flat tire and literally like 5-6 of my boys and I are standing around looking up and watching videos on how to fix a flat tire lol, we even called over another friend who lived nearby to come help us out. I think back to that time my friend had a flat tire and I went to go help her even tho I wasn't too sure what I was doing, but I did it and I was dang proud I did it myself lol. I've had a lot of time to think about life lately. Maybe it's cuz at school I zone out and at work I definitely zone out so I'm always daydreaming or thinking about random stuff LOL. Anyways, I've been thinking about life lately...and you ever feel like you're going down the wrong path, like you know it's the wrong path...but you still keep going. It's funny cuz I feel like growing up, whatever your parents, religion or school teaches you...you're taught to think of what is right and wrong and like whether you're on the right track or not...but like I've been learning in social service work...everything depends on the person and the situation. I dunno where I'm going with this...but I'll end with it...I just feel like I'm lost right now, wandering aimlessly...and I know I shouldn't be...but I don't know which is the right direction I should be moving in. I feel like I'm lacking a lot of guidance and direction in my life right now lol...till next time, whenever that is...peace.