The Art Of Listening

The Art Of Being Lowkey
The Art Of Surprise

Hey people, so a long time ago, probably some time when I was high school...I remember having a conversation with my cousin. It doesn't really matter what we were talking about, I remember we were on a train, and I was standing across from her but I was looking down at my feet and the floor...suddenly she goes "Rodmond, you know when you talk to people, you gotta look them in the eyes, it lets them know you're part of the conversation, that you're engaged, that you're listening." Ever since then, I've really made it a conscious effort to be engaged and to be a good listener, and for the most part, people have told me that I am a good listener. Eye contact (aside from driving and some other situations) is perhaps the most key indicator of listening and being engaged. See you can be hearing the words someone is saying, but that doesn't mean that you're listening to what they're saying. Sometimes as a friend...and I'm sure most of y'all have been on both sides of the spectrum...but I  personally feel a super important quality in a friend is simply being present, being there to listen to someone rant...some might see it as just being a lifeless body or a set of ears...but it's so much more than that...especially when you're on the other end and are the one ranting and pouring your heart out...having someone on the other end as a "set of ears" lets them know not only are they being heard, but that they're being cared for. Listening isn't just hearing what's being said...it's so much more, it's truly an art, because there's so many components. It's body language, posture, eye contact, listening intently and intentionally. The other part of listening is also responding...it can be as simple as nodding your head, chiming in like "oh okay, yeah keep going"...usually even if people are ranting and talking for long periods of time, they'll pause here and there...that's your in to just show you're listening you know and actually hearing what they're saying. The worst is talking to somebody and feeling like they're not hearing what you're saying. I really hate that...to the point where as of late...I'll just stop whatever I'm talking about because I'm wasting my time if I know the person isn't engaged...if the person is just hearing but not listening. People tell me I'm a quiet guy or always ask why I don't talk that much in certain situations...tbh I just like listening and hearing what people have to say....I think it's what I'm good at. I remember talking to this one friend and she was like you know, you're a really good listener, she's like that's why people like to come to you to rant and to talk. And the more I thought about it...a lot of my good friends, a lot of people in my life...love to talk...LOL. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but I mean if people love to talk, someone's gotta listen right. I'll leave y'all with this..cuz Jackie Chan says it best...enjoy.