You Gotta Let Go To Move Forward

Day 2/31

Hey y'all, so I went to dinner with dad just now and it was dope just being able to talk to him about life, school, my plans and stuff. I definitely get my knack for using analogies from him, cuz when he was just talking to me about like life and church and stuff...he used analogies that were relatable and made it easier to understand. Pretty much he was like...you people wanna hold onto certain things so bad that it prevents them from moving forward y'feel. And that made so much sense to me...he was like take 2016 for example...you gotta let go of what happened in 2016 in order to move on to 2017, you can't be holding onto things like grudges or whatever happened in the past cuz it distracts, slows you down and prevents you from moving forward. It made me think of another analogy I heard...like imagine you're in a jungle swinging from vine to vine. You can't swing and grab onto another vine without first letting go of the vine you're already holding onto...otherwise you slow yourself down and risk like falling or whatever, you get it what I'm saying? I guess it was just a good reminder for me...and hopefully to you...that you gotta let go in order to move on, move forward. Letting go can be scary cuz you want that certainty of having the next vine in your hands,s but it's not like that...you can't grab something, then decide to let go of the old thing. You gotta let go of the old thing first before grabbing the new one...whatever that may be for you. But yeah, just some real insightful words from my dad, till tomorrow...peace out.

Hello 2017

Day 1/31

Happy new year friends...haven't spoken to y'all since last year...........GOT'EM LOL. But uh, here we are...back again, ANOTHER 31 STRAIGHT DAYS of posts...hope y'all can handle it without getting annoyed of me, jokes. But uh, I guess let's get straight into it.

Starting off the new year, it hit me like a truck...if you want something...GO AND GET IT. Don't ask questions, don't think about it...don't doubt yourself or your worth...be confident. If you want something, believe that you can get it, then work hard and go get it. The more you think, the more you convince yourself that you're not worth it, that you can't do it, that it's out of your reach. Whether it's good grades, a job, a girl, a boy...if you want it...GO GET IT. Missed opportunities is one of the worst feelings ever...looking back and going dang, I wish this, I wish that...what if this, what if that. TAKE RISKS...failure and rejection are A PART OF LIFE. It helps us grow, learn and when we're faced with the same situation, we know what to and what not to do. I'd rather say I did it and failed or did it and got rejected than be like nah I didn't do it, or wonder what would've or could've happened if I did to it. What;s even worse is seeing someone else do it, or get it...and be like that could've been me. Take risks, don't be afraid to fail or get rejected, that's life...you live, you learn, you grow. Believe in yourself, I know I sound preachy...but it really hit me in the face and especially in the heart. Missing an opportunity and seeing someone else do what I couldn't...it doesn't even make me mad...it just...stings...real bad. I thought about it too much...I doubted myself, I convinced myself out of it, I didn't believe in myself...and now I'm sitting here like well what if this, what if that. And I don't want the same for you...take chances...it's scary I know, but the failure or rejection only hurts for a little bit...whereas not knowing...that can and will last...I'm telling you. That's all I really have, see y'all tomorrow.

The 2016 Wrap Up

Day 31/31

We made it guys...31 days of straight posts...it's been dope and it's kept me on my feet. My last gift to y'all is that for the month of JANUARY...I'm gonna (not do my best, but DO) post every single day...hit y'all with another month of straight posts. LET'S GOOOOO. But yeah...2016 was a bit of a step back for the blog...in terms of not putting out as much content as previous years...but if you've been with me for the ride...you'll know the amount of posts per year has been getting lower...but I personally think the content has been better...more personal and deep, and I kinda wanna go that route you know. 2016 felt really long but really short at the same time...so here are some of the highlights o my year...

This year I..
- graduated....finally, mama I made it, some nights I never thought I'd get to this point...some days I thought I was a failure, an idiot...but I made it...and it wasn't even just barely getting by either..I worked by butt off and had a pretty decent average
- got another tattoo...sorry mom and dad LOL, probably the most painful of the 3...but just another part of my journey y'feel
- got the chance to teach...with my old elementary school teacher, legit teach a class, run lessons, mark tests and stuff...it was super dope seeing the behind the scenes life of a teacher, interacting with students as a teacher...
- went to all star weekend in Toronto, sad I didn't bump into any celebrities or nba players while they were in town...but to see everybody in one place was dope
- went to a televised WWE event, I've been to like house shows...but to go to an actual televised event  where I could've been on TV...and bro...GOLDBERG was there...holy
- went to my first baseball game in Toronto (I would say Bluejays game but I went to one in New York), sorry but I just can't get into baseball...LOOOL, it's probably up there with hockey in terms of boring...sorry not sorry
- went to a Kanye West concert...which was lit, like dude is a performer holy...sucks to see what he's been up to lately...but that ranks in like top 3 concerts I've ever been to
- became a counselor for the high school fellowship at my church...it's only been a couple of months, but it's been super dope...and some days, I feel like one of the gang...these kids output so much joy and happiness it rubs off on you I swear
- hit 300,000 hits on the blog and reached 7 years...wow, has it really been that long...starting this blog in high school, here we are now...what a ride

But uh, that's all I could think of for the most part, I hope 2016 was good for you. I adopted the motto from one of my favourite youtubers Timothy Dela Ghetto....that things are gonna happen to you in life...but it's about how you react and respond to it you know. Good or bad...you can let it get you down...or you can turn it around and use it as motivation, as experience y'feel. Be safe tonight friends, hope you ring in 2017 with people you care about and enjoy being around, I know I sure will...SEE Y'ALL IN 2017 AND SEE Y'ALL TOMORROW, PEACE.

Less Is More

Day 30/31

Hey folks, I'm sorry the posts have been straight up lame as of late...no excuses, I'm sorry. So at first I was gonna rant cuz I was feeling pretty annoyed, but y'all don't deserve that. Lemme just say tho...I hate panning events. Like I usually do it, but I don't enjoy it you know, and there's usually other people to help me out. This year it's all me, I hate having to chase down people who read and don't respond you know...or read and don't follow instructions, like damn man...make my life easier, please...I'm tryna do something nice for everyone...holy.

Anyways...so, I've been thinking a lot lately (what else is new) about just the old times I guess (not a good idea friends). How Christmas gatherings or whatever...whether family or friends...used to be huge. For family gatherings...I'd see so many of my aunts, uncles and cousins...and for friend hangouts...everyone would WANT to come out and see everybody and hang out. As I've gotten older...everyone's kinda doing their own thing, in their own lane, with their own groups...and it sucks to see of course, but it made me realize that sometimes...less is more. When you're a kid...when I was a kid...and you throw a party for example...you want that party to be lit...you want EVERYBODY to show up otherwise it's a dud and people are gonna make fun of you...if everyone shows up, you can brag about it the next day and be like yo my party had THIS MANY mans. As I've gotten older...less is more...an example would be all you can eat sushi...it's not the same for me anymore...I can't just indulge until I'm bloated and I wanna throw up, I eat smart...I eat what I like and what I wanna eat until I'm comfortably full. It's the same thing here...less is more. Nowadays...for me, it's not about the big parties...having EVERYBODY show up...having HUGE gatherings...unfortunately,a lot of that is a thing of the past for the most part. It's sad to see growing up has kinda pushed everyone off into different directions, paths and stages of life, but it is what it is. Less is more...same with my circle of friends...I used to love just knowing everybody and being casual and friendly with everyone...now, I'm happy with my small and tight knit circle of friends. So sometimes, I think about the old times and how dope it used to be seeing everyone come out and legit excited...now, it's about reminding myself that I can have an equally if more better a time with less people, but people that I'm much closer with, y'feel. Man...this whole growing up thing is weird man...being around my tight knit group of friends...but also being around and counseling younger high school kids...I get to see 2 different perspectives...I just have to be careful not to lose myself you know...thanks for sticking with me through these 30 days...tomorrow will be my 2016 wrap up of some highlights of my year...see y'all tomorrow.

Me, Myself & I

Day 29/31

Hey friends, running a little late today, so here's something from 2009 that I wrote, enjoy.

I'm stumbling in this alternate reality
Where things aren't as they seem
I'm surrounded by people who try too hard
I wonder when I'll wake up from this dream
They say this and that, act like that and this
While hiding behind a mask
This fake persona fools no one
Yet they try so hard to accomplish this task
Lately I haven't been myself it seems
I apologize but I swear I didn't mean
To hurt the ones that I love so much
But people make it hard to trust

I've got day to day issues
While dealing with day to day basics
It's hard to keep a clear mind
While dealing with this fake shit
You see I don't like to use the word hate too much
Cuz it's an ugly word
But you define what it means
I know you heard
I don't wanna stress
Or struggle no more
I ain't dealing with this
I'm walking out that door

RT

Public, Private, Secret

Day 28/31

Hey y'all, so I forget where I heard it from, but someone once said that everyone leads three different lives...their public, private and secret life. Your public life is the life you live for everyone to see and it's out in the open. Your private life is probably things only your family and your close friends know. Your secret life then is just between you and yourself...and for myself and people...God as well. I think it varies from person to person tho...like this blog...has kinda become my public life, but it's pretty personal and private...things normal people would keep in their private life...I kinda throw it out into my public life. It just kinda had me thinking about your inner circle of friends...or my inner circle of friends...that no matter how close you get to someone...you'll always have portion or portions of your life you keep to yourself or you keep between you and God. It's always interesting and cool seeing friends or people transition from your public life to your private life...seeing yourself slowly sharing more personal and intimate things with people. But yeah, sorry for the real short posts as of late...it's a busy time of the year...lots of gatherings and I've been going out a lot so a lot of posts are rushed or on the go. I definitely wanna do a wrap up or year review post...I have that in motion already, just need to go through some other stuff. The good thing about blogging and tweeting a lot is I can go through the entire year and it's like a timeline of what I did throughout the year, so yeah...lookout for that in the coming days...other than that, see y'all on the flip side, peace.

I Almost Died Skiing

Day 27/31

Hey friends, today has been an extremely long and tiring but fun day. And I'm writing this from a moving car right now. I went skiing with some of my friends, we went to Blue Mountain which is like a 2 hour drive so it was hectic. Got up at like 7 and ate some food, I made sure to like pack my gloves, snow pants and all that jazz the night before so I wasn't stressing the morning of. We picked up my two other friends and stopped by McDonald's somewhere in like Barrie or maybe it was King City. We ended up getting to Blue Mountain at like 11 ish. One of my boys has skis already so he was good to go. My two other friends and I had to wait literally an hour and a half to rent the skis, boots and poles...holy that was such a mission, I lost my hat in the process too, good thing I brought two. We finally got on the slopes around 2:30 ish and we didn't waste any time. We went on the bunny hill and then immediately went towards the more advanced hills, my heart already started to beat faster. I've only been skiing like 2-3 times in my life, like twice when I was in elementary school and another tim like one or two years ago. So I'm not a very experienced skier, bruh my boys took me to this like either green or blue hill and it was hectic, I fell like 3 times going down the same hill during the same run...it was so hectic, so after a couple more times, I was like nah I'm not bout it and went back to the chill hills, then eventually the bunny hills to end off the day lol. Yo so funny story, when I was a kid I went skiing and went down the bunny hill...I think I wasn't paying attention or something and ended up skiing straight into these orange garbage bags and did a front flip and like both my skis flew off LOL. Needless to say I didn't leave the bunny hill that day. It's jokes cuz in elementary school you have to go through tests and they'll give you a green sticker or a blue sticker you out on your tag so they know you passed the test. Today and even the last time I went skiing, you can go on whatever hill you want, last time I went on black diamond and saw my life flash before my eyes, LOL. Morale of the story, I'm pretty sure I'm not meant for skiing. Or any kind of like vehicle/apparatus related sport...skateboarding, rollerblading, skating...all that jazz. Like fam I didn't learn how to ride a bike till I ess like in grade 6-7 and even then I crashed into my boy the first time LOOOL. But yeah, hope y'all had just as an eventful day as me, or somewhat did lol, see y'all tomorrow.